How to Stop Feeling your Feelings
When people stop overeating and bingeing, it’s sometimes too hard to feel your feelings! This is what to do instead!
I thought I would just do a quick one here because it was something I was thinking about. I work a lot with overeating and often, overeating coincides with some food addiction that goes on and when we get into food addiction, it’s this feeling of powerless over the food that’s happening.
Sometimes there’s the concept of coming up of people that are overeating or binging to numb feelings. So then when someone stops binging or stops overeating, they say “Oh, I should feel the feelings. That’s what I need to do. I need to feel the feelings and that’s going to get me through this .
I say yes and no. Sometimes feeling “the feelings” is really hard to do and maybe it’s not a good time to feel those feelings. Maybe it’s just too hard. Maybe it feels too hard for you.
So instead, what I recommend in those situations are:
- Distract and
Detach yourself from what’s going on. If you can at all distract yourself however you can. Maybe that’s going for a walk wherever you are, Maybe that’s with a TV show. Maybe it’s calling a friend, or texting somebody. Maybe it’s scrolling social media. I don’t know, distract yourself and decompress.
So try to bring the pressure off of yourself, off of those feelings. “I don’t have to feel right now. Actually, I can just simply do something else other than overeating, other than binge.” I hope is helpful for you.
I was talking to someone the other day about 12 steps by Overeaters Anonymous and one of the first phrases; step one is that you’re powerless. You’re powerless over food. “Well, how does that work? If you’re powerless over food then, whatever, just eat the food. Why doesn’t that happen?”
Oh, that does happen actually! People do feel powerless over food but step one is really about turning that over, saying “Okay, I’m powerless but the dialectic is: I’m taking action so that I feel less powerless. I’m taking action so that I’m not living an addiction. I’m taking action”; and that could be small actions or it could be larger actions. Larger action may be going to a meeting or going to rehab for someone who’s having an addiction that needs that.
Sometimes food does need that actually. They do have some food addiction rehabs around the country in the U.S. I think there are a couple around the world actually but occasionally someone needs that. So that’s a larger action. A smaller action is, I’m going to a meeting. I’m going to text a friend. I’m going to throw away whatever it is that perhaps is calling to you to eat it. It’s things like that that are the smaller actions.
So it’s holding the two. Yes, I feel powerless right now, so what is one action I can take to actually feel more in control? That may be prayer. Prayer to the universe, religious, however you believe something like that. That’s a very small action that people can take internally and that can help them in the moment that doesn’t look like you’re necessarily doing something to somebody else that may be there in a waiting room or something and there’s Donuts there and you’re like; “What can I do?”.
I hope this helps. I know I veered a little bit off topic from the detached, distract, decompress but hopefully some of the ideas I gave you helped you. Before you go, remember to get your Free Hypnosis to reduce Fear and Anxiety!
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Peace and Health,