Stepping out of Perfectionism to Reduce anxiety
Perfectionism is a total anxiety and stress producer! Learn how to step out of perfectionism to reduce anxiety and stress with Dr. Liz.
Hi, Dr. Liz here at Conversations for Effective Living and the Hypnotize Me podcast. I know that’s starting to show up on your feed, so give it a listen sometime.
Today’s topic is moving out of perfectionism to reduce anxiety. So often, anxiety comes up when we think that something has to be perfect or it has to be like everything perfect and everything just like this or else something’s wrong or something horrible is going to happen.
Now sometimes this actually moves into OCD when you start doing rituals around preventing whatever you think is going to happen if you don’t do those. If it’s not done perfectly and not done a particular number of times, but often, this will come up with general anxiety.
Like, “Oh, the tree is not perfect.” (I’m recording this around the holidays so), “I’m going to feel bad, and I’m going to feel anxious, and I’m going to worry about judgment, and I’m going to worry about my kids if the tree is not perfect.”
All of these feelings start to come up and the best thing you can do to reduce that anxiety is not fix the tree, is not fix whatever you think needs to be fixed and made perfect, but to really just take a breath and say, “Okay, it’s good enough. It doesn’t have to be perfect. It’s good enough. The kids are happy. Everybody loves the tree. The ornaments are on it. The lights are good enough. It’s going to be okay. Next year, nobody’s going to remember this. They’ll only remember the experience of putting up a tree or the experience of making cookies together. They won’t remember if the cookies were like a hundred percent perfect or not.” Like, no.
They’ll remember the experience of being together and being in the kitchen, and that type of thing. No one’s going to remember if the house was perfectly clean for a party. They’re going to remember being at the party with you, and all the wonderful things that happened, and spending time with you, and doing all of that stuff.
When anxious feelings come up about it not being good enough, take a deep breath and try to reassure yourself, “It’s good enough. It’s okay. I don’t have to be Super Man or I don’t have to be Super Woman. It’s all good enough.”
Concentrate on the relationships between people versus the outside, outward appearance of things. Okay. That’s my tip for this week. I hope you have a wonderful week.
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