Look out for those holiday parties and dinners! Listen in for 5 Tips for Better Eating during the Holidays on this week’s episode of the Hypnotize Me podcast! You don’t want to miss the great resources this week!
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Listened to in over 140 countries, Hypnotize Me is the podcast about hypnosis, transformation, and healing. Certified hypnotherapist and Licensed Mental Health Counselor, Dr. Elizabeth Bonet, discusses the research behind hypnosis, interviews professionals doing transformational work, and talks to individuals who have had hypnosis. Free hypnoses are also given from time to time. If you’re interested in learning more about the magic of hypnosis, psychotherapy and mindfulness, this is the perfect place to feed your fascination!
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Dr. Liz [0:00]
Hi everyone, Dr. Liz here. So this week I’m going to talk about something relevant to the holidays. The US just had Thanksgiving and for a lot of the world. Christmas is coming up. So I want to speak to that and over eating So this is a holiday special. I’m going to do a whole week last month in like January, February, somewhere in there that talks about a variety of things around a weight and eating and mindful eating and all this stuff, but this episode is concentrated on not overeating. So, before we jump into it, just an easy way to let you know how to join my newsletter is to text the word hypnotize to 444999. That’s the word hypnotize to 444999. All right. Now, I have worked with overeaters for a really long time. So I will say that I am not a specialist in anorexia, or I would say bulimia although they have come through my office through the years, but over eating is definitely one of my specialties. I have read a lot about it. I have experienced it myself. I call myself an ex-overeater it’s a struggle. Okay, it really is for overeaters, I would say that it really rules their life in many, many ways.
When you hear over eaters really share and talk, it is a constant thought about food, a constant, they often will go to the grocery store or the drive thru or the convenience store, just to get something to overeat on, a favorite treat or some type of food, whether that’s salty or sweet. The often go to a party and all they can think about is the food. They can’t really concentrate on anything else. Same with let’s say going out to eat and you would think well, going out to eat is about food, right? You’re going to eat, really it’s about nourishing yourself. As well as enjoying the company you’re with if you’re with somebody, most people go out to eat with somebody, I am a person who’s gone out to eat, gone to the movies done all kinds of stuff alone, actually, because I was single for a very long time. But often when they’re going out to eat an overeater will think just about the food, you’re able to think about it the whole day before, right? Or sometimes days before, if they know they’re going out to dinner, let’s say on a Friday with some friends. And it’s often a process though that is not very pleasant. What I mean by that is when someone is not an overeater, and they have plans to go out with friends for Friday to a particular restaurant, they may think about what they like at that restaurant, but then it’s gone. Right? They don’t obsess about it. They don’t develop strategies for how to eat the meal meaning okay. I’m going to have this and then I know I went the dessert. So I’m going to have to save room for that. Or what? How am I not going to eat? The particular something food that they don’t want to eat? Let’s say french fries is an easy one. How am I not going to eat the french fries, even if my partner gets the french fries. So it is a process of not just anticipation and looking forward to being with friends, and we’ll have some food as well. It’s a process that gets centered around the food. That’s all you can think about is the food. Hey, so that’s very different.
I just want to distinguish that for people who perhaps you’re listening to this and you’re not an overeater, and you want to understand someone who is that these are some of the common processes that go on. Someone who’s an overeater will obsess about a food all day but then struggle with not wanting to go get that food because they know they really shouldn’t, right. It’s not good for them. Like that doesn’t nourish their body. It doesn’t doesn’t do the body good, right? But they’ll think about it all day. So they’ll say, Okay, I get off at five, and then I can go through that drive through or by that convenience store and get that particular food on my way home. And then when I get home, I can eat this, this and this, okay? So it’s an all day process, often, and when they’re struggling with it, when they’re saying, I don’t really want to over eat, then they’ll think about ways to get around it. Well, maybe if I work late, or maybe if I do this, or maybe if I do that, then I won’t do that. So that hopefully gives you a better idea what goes on. You do find some people who they sort of go into a trance. So they’ll find that they ate a whole bag of chips and they really are in a trance. They didn’t know how it happened when they get to the end and they’re like, oh geez, and they wake up the next morning or they go to bed feeling really deep self loathing. Do not feel good about this.
They’ll often hide food as well like hide eating. So they’ll hide a special treats that nobody else eats it in the house or they’ll get up out of bed and eat in the middle of the night. So nobody sees them eating it, even family members. They’ll hide from it as sort of the secrecy around food. So let’s talk about some of the solutions here. Okay, now, these are just a few tips to help get you through the holidays. I really believe that deeper healing is necessary to help you overcome overeating. There is an interview on going to air in the upcoming season where I talk about this more in depth particular method. But I do want to say that overeating and weight and keeping weight on and weight gain is often about deeper processes going on. Now, once you heal those deeper processes going on, then it becomes easier to follow tips and tricks and to techniques that you can use to help yourself either lose weight or just not over eat, like eat mindfully. The deeper healing can happen various ways.
I believe that some people can use Overeaters Anonymous, completely free program. Even if there’s not a meeting in your area, there’s phone meetings that you can call into from all over the world. And Overeaters Anonymous is incredibly supportive program. Because they do like phone marathons on holidays because they know holidays are hard for people it is like an overeaters nightmare holiday if you’re trying to control over eating. So they’ll do like around the clock, 24 hour phone meetings to help support people and it’s completely free. So that’s an option for people. Hypnosis is obviously an option for people to help yourself do the deeper healing as well as move into self respect. I really believe self control goes up lot with self respect, people call it self control. But then they feel really bad if they feel like they can’t control themselves. And when we trace it back, it really is like self esteem and self respect. Like how important is it to you to respect your own body to respect yourself to nourish your body instead of harm it. Okay, so there’s that.
There’s the mindful eating movement, which has been really, really wonderful. It was a key piece in my own recovery from overeating is learning how to mindfully eat.
And then there’s sort of the opposite of that, which is “Never binge again” by Glenn Livingston, it is a free ebook. I’m going to talk about it more in the future and I have an interview with him coming up. But just to tell you right now, you can download it for free on Amazon or through his website, by the same name, Neverbingeagain.com and it is a game changer. If you’re trying to change anything about your diet. Actually. I was listening to a podcast that was talking about a particular eating method. And she brought up the book and she said, I’m not a binger. I never have been a binger. And I wish this book had a different title. But it’s so important because it really helped me change into this way of eating that she felt was healthy for her. So highly recommend that.
So let’s get to some of the tips that help you through the holidays.
I would start with preparation I have a mindful eating hypnosis that’s on the podcast for free and then I also have one that’s more in depth that you can buy and download off my website DrLizhypnosis. com right under downloads or for sale, that label changes from time to time. But there’s one there that’s more in depth to or you can listen to the free one that’s on the podcast, but I would saying begin preparing yourself in terms of learning how to mindfully eat, meaning learning how to pay attention to what you’re eating, to pay attention to your body signals over eaters often lose their body signals. They really don’t know what full feels like or hungry feels like actually may have no idea how to really tune into that and figure out where their body is. So there is a handout that I use in my practice that you can easily get if you Google it. And it’s the hunger fullness rating scale. If you email me, I’ll just send you a copy. Hey, email@example.com super easy email. But feel free to email me and I’ll send you the copy even if you’re listening to this two years from now, go ahead and email me I’ll send you the copy or you can Google it. The Hunger fullness rating scale and it breaks it down from zero to 10. From not hungry to really hungry. And it gives you helpful tips about where you are and when’s a good time to eat in, when’s not a good time to eat. So I know when I was first learning about mindful eating, this really helped me, I would pull up the scale. And I would look at it and try to figure out where my body was.
Now another thing in the mindful eating is, when you begin to tune into your body and look at signals that your body is getting full, then it becomes a really helpful process. So one signal that your body is getting full is that you’re chewing slower. I honestly did not know this before, like, I don’t know, five or 10 years ago, like seriously then, like, oh, when you’re chewing slows down, that means your body is getting full. So that’s a really helpful signal. When your jaw is getting tired. Your party is probably getting full. So that’s another tip.
So I would start to practicing this before you go into a holiday party or a holiday dinner is just figuring out what’s hungry and what’s full. Another tip is to eat something that you know is healthy for you before you go to the party or the dinner. Or they get together whatever it is. So we all know there’s sweet treats that are going to be there, right unless you’re have like a total . . . I don’t know you’re going to like keto con right or Ketofest or something or you have a get together and you’re only keto friends, then there’s not going to be like unhealthy stuff there. But but the exception of that there’s going to be sweets there. If you don’t know what keto is it’s a very low carb type of eating, where you keep your . . .
Some people say net Some people say total, but you keep your carbs under about 20. Some people call it keto, if it’s under 50. But generally when you’re getting over 20, net carbs or total carbs, then you’re getting low carb and not necessarily keto, anyway, unless you’re going to that kind of gathering, there’s going to be sweets. So they’re just going to be desserts. And sometimes there won’t be anything healthy. There may be a fruit platter, there may be a cheese platter, there may be some salad there, but sometimes there’s not, it is just straight out desserts. So if you know that you have a problem as an overeater, stopping, then eat before you go. You can say I’m not going to actually eat anything when I get there. And that is sometimes helpful I’m going to eat before. If you know that you have a problem with control, like if I eat one of those I can’t stop, then that is often a good rule for you of what I’m not going to eat anything there. I will have a drink or I’ll have a cup of tea or a coffee and that I will have in my hand so that people aren’t constantly offering me something, you know, something like that. That’s another tip. Another thing you can do is think of other things that you can do during the gathering. Other than eat.
So let’s say you’re going into a family gathering a family meal, and you are going to eat some things at the meal. But you also know Okay, I’m going to be there the whole day or four hours. Then what are some other things that you can do? Can you play with the children? Can you take a walk? Can you read a book? Can you take along some craft type work to work on? I recently at Thanksgiving, I was working on a little mini quilt. And so I did that while people were talking and hanging around. It’s a nice way for me to have something to do so that I’m not bored while also being able to be part of the conversation. So sometimes handwork is like that crafty stuff is like that and I just carried my whole kit along. I have a little sewing kit and carry that along. I’ve cared large quotes to this one happened to be a mini but I’ve carried large quotes along to work on as well as family gatherings. But you can do that you can bring a book, you can do something that you know you enjoy that isn’t food focused. So that’s another tip that can help, I would say.
Another thing to do is to be kind to yourself, hey, so, overeaters are often very critical and harsh with themselves. They have this incredibly critical voice that comes out and calls them all kinds of awful names and puts them down. I would say put that one in the closet or wherever you want to send them if you want to send them halfway around the world and let them relax on a beach in Tahiti if you don’t live by Tahiti. I know this podcast is listened to all over the world. You can send them to Florida if they want to come hang out with me. But believe me, they will not be talking to me critically Okay, I will handle them. I will put them somewhere where they’re safe. But put that one away. And bring out your kindness voice. The voice you would use, hopefully soothing a small child. And it sounds something like it’s okay. You’re going to be okay. You’re going to get through this. Yes, you struggle sometimes. But we all struggle and that’s okay. So let’s do something that feels good. Let’s take care of you. And overeating is not taking care of you. nourishing your body, nourishing your mind. nourishing Your heart is taking care of you. Hey, so you flip the voice from critical to very soothing and comforting. That’s another thing you can do.
The final tip, I would say is the opposite of that. Okay, it is based on “Never binge again,” Glenn Livingston’s work and as I said earlier, I am going to have him on the podcast and talk about that more in depth, but I’m just going to give you the brief right here is you can make rules for yourself, meaning I am going to Christmas dinner, and I will eat this, this and this. I will have one bite, one spoonful one forkful of my two favorite desserts. Or I will have one piece of my favorite dessert. And that’s it. Hey, these are my rules. I make the rules. My highest best self is making the rule. So I am going to follow the rule for my own benefit.
Now in the book, he goes more into the really critical voice but sort of saying, hey, if I want to break the rule, that’s my pig talking.
And I’m going to put my pig and its cage. It’s somewhat the opposite of this soothing, comforting voice. It’s like get on over there into your cage, get back in your cage pig, you’re not going to take over here. These are my rules. And these are the ones I’m going to follow that I’ve made my highest best self. So that’s a tip. Now, if you can’t follow the rule, I really do recommend downloading his book and giving it a thorough read. Hey, because that tip doesn’t work for everybody. You know, I hear people say, Well, if I could follow the rule, I wouldn’t be an overeater. And I totally get that. I totally get it. But I also know that you have personal power that you follow rules all the time. Right, you generally don’t break the law. I’m assuming most people don’t break the law. Most people don’t run a stop sign. Most people don’t insult their mother in law. Most people don’t hit their kids. Why?
Because you’ve made a rule in your head about it. Somebody calls those values. Some people call them morals some people call them laws but basically you’ve made a rule in your head about it. Because you think it’s for your greatest benefit, and often the greatest benefit of society. So when you’re making the rule think of it that way. This is for my greatest benefit that I do not have dessert at all. Or I have one piece of dessert. That’s it. No seconds, no getting three desserts no getting that. You know any of that. I will just have one dessert or I will not have any bread. If that’s the problem area for you. And then in the moment you remind yourself this is for my highest benefit. Yes, that bread looks good and it smells wonderful. And look how soft it looks. But I know that if I have one piece I will eat the whole basket so I will not have one piece. I will not have bread. That is my rule. That’s the best highest thing I can do for myself today. So that’s where it comes back to.
I think self respect and self esteem is being able to bring that forth in the mind when you need it. And really believing that to you, like this is for your best and highest good. Now, I do want to say that if you are struggling with any of these, if you’re like, I can’t make a rule that I can keep for the life of me, then you’re really looking at deeper, emotional things going on in you, right? Like that’s just the truth of it. So reach out for help.
Heal that part of yourself. Whether that’s with someone local, where you live, or whether that’s with me. I am thinking of doing group in 2020 so that it’s much more affordable for people, but a group around eating and hypnosis like combining the two. So if you’re interested in that, too drop me an email, firstname.lastname@example.org. There are ways to help yourself. Many, many ways hypnosis is just one. Right reading a book is just one there’s so many ways. And I really respect that people find the way that fits them best. I really believe that you find the way that fits you best. You find the information that you need, hopefully at the right time. Sometimes I definitely wish I had information sooner than when I get it later. But you find the information that you need and sometimes their life transformed just based on hearing a podcast or reading an article or picking up a book that you didn’t expect to pick up. All kinds of ways to change. So I’m going to wrap up right there. I hope you have a very happy holiday season. And that you find the least small moments of joy. That’s what I look for small moments of joy and Sometimes when a lot of those get added together I have a wonderful day right and I hope the same for you. I’ll talk to you soon. Peace.
I hope you truly enjoying today’s episode. Remember that you can get free hypnosis downloads over at my website, Dr. Liz hypnosis calm, d r Li see hypnosis, calm. I work all over the world doing hypnosis. So if you’re interested in working with me, please schedule a free consultation over at my website, and we’ll see what your goals are and if I can be of service to you and helping you reach them. Finally, if you like today’s episode, please subscribe to the podcast or tell a friend that way more and more people learn about the power of hypnosis.
Transcribed by https://otter.ai